Weirded Out

Melinda R. from NorCal wrote:

I just don’t understand men. Maybe you can shed light on their weird behavior.

Melinda, I hope I’m not the only one who sees the irony in your query.   Don’t get me started on how it’s hard to understand women and their weird ways.

Look, we’re all weird when it comes to relationships.  Guys at their core want a firme hyna who they can chill with and not fake the funk of who they really are.  It takes us men a while to get it as far as knowing what we want.   The weird stuff we do is just our bumbling through relating to women.  There will always be misunderstandings in all relationships. 

Here are a couple of keys to help you, and other women, understand us men.

  1. Understand that we are stupid in relationships.  We can read complex defenses in football; we understand the dynamics of a pick and roll and how to defend in basketball; we understand signs catchers and third base coaches give.  However, we need friggin’ Indiana Jones, a GPS and a Little Orphan Annie decoder ring to figure out what you mean when you say, “I’m OK.”  Women have got to quit assuming we know what they are thinking.  We don’t.  For the love of God, please tell us!
  2. Understand that we’re actually quite simple.  We’re not simpletons but we have a simple way in which we live.  If there’s nagging or invasions of that simple life, we fold like the French in almost every major war they’ve been in.  For us you have to KISS=Keep It Simple Stupid.
  3. We really need to be stimulated and I’m not talking south of the border, cochinos!  There comes a time when we quit focusing on the 4 S’s (Sex, Suds, Sports and Sex).  All that stuff is trivial, especially when we finally figure out what’s really important, which is finding somebody who can stimulate our minds into deep and true intimacy.

This concludes our quick guided tour of keys to understanding men.  Hope you enjoyed the ride and thank you for keeping your hands and feet inside the tram.  Remember, you are parked in Dopey.  Dopey is your parking area.

Submit your questions to: ask_jefe@yahoo.com

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