Family Ties Or Family Fights

Ellie wrote:

I recently ran into a family conflict. I knew the date of something important to the extended family.  However, I had other plans in effect. I know it really bugs the family but I had to do what I had dedicated myself to previously.  My brother won’t even acknowledge me. I just try to let it fall off my back but it still hurts. I know the extended fam is disappointed that my family and I were not at this engagement.  What should I do?

Ellie, family is important whether it’s immediate or extended.  Every family is going to have their share of pedos (arguments, disagreements, y todo).  Things can get messy if the parties involved make no attempt at a resolution.  Let’s try and dig a little deeper into your dilema, shall we?

First, it’s wrong of your brother to ignore you.  I know it must hurt but something tells me deeper issues are involved.  You said that your absence really bugs the family, why is that?  Why are they really bugged out while the extended family is just disappointed?  Your immediate family must know things  the others don’t.  Maybe it had something to do with your other plans.  Only you know so be honest with yourself about it.

How long has it been since you’ve seen your extended family?  Did you not want to see them?  Do you have conflict with any of them?  I understand that life happens and you have a family of your own but you did say it was an important event so missing it for whatever reason rubbed people the wrong way.  Jefe comes from a huge family.  He’s Mexican so that shouldn’t come as a shock.  The point is, Jefe tries not to miss any opportunity to see his big family.

You need to talk to your brother and be honest about the issues that are causing this rift.  Something tells me it goes beyond missing a family gathering.  Hopefully, your conflict can be resolved and you can make it to another family event.  Dang, I’m hungry now because I’m thinking about my tia’s carnitas and my other tia’s potato salad…oohhh (Homer Simpson stilo).   Jefe, out.

Submit your questions to: ask_jefe@yahoo.com

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One response to “Family Ties Or Family Fights

  1. The opportunities to get together with extended family are few and far between given that everyone is on a different schedule. But when something is planned in advance we should do our best to take advantage of the chance to reunite with them. :)

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