Confused or Just Delaying?

Going Nutty in the IE, wrote:

I’ve been seeing a really great guy for the past two months.  Things are going good but my ex keeps calling and wants to get back.  I’m not going to lie, I still have feelings for him but the new guy is just so sincere and is the opposite of my ex.  I feel like I have an obligation to the ex because we were together a long time and he was kind of like a project for me.  I’m confused about what I should do because the ex swears he’s changed and I’m kind of curious to see if it’s true.  Then again, the new guy treats me great and does things for me that I’ve never experienced before in a relationship.  He treats me like a lady.  I’m torn.  What should I do?

Nutty, you said a lot to say so little.  Seems to me you already have your mind set on getting back with your ex.  A lot of times, people will write to Jefe and not realize that their mind has written what their heart has spoken.  Watcha, that was kind of deep.  Anywados…

I’m not saying you’re Tina and your ex is Ike, but when you say the new guy treats you great and you’re experiencing things in a relationship that you never have before, e.g., being treated like a lady, then that doesn’t speak well of the ex.   It also doesn’t speak well of who you are and the things you accept in your life.  You need to value who you are as a person because a woman should never let herself be treated less than a lady.

Jefe dislikes when people use confusion as an excuse to buy time.  Let’s be real here.  No, I’m not talking about the vato from Cypress Hill.  What I am talking about is how people say they are confused about a matter in a relationship/life because their mind is set and they want to see how long they can get away with being selfish.  That type of confusion is decision delayed.

Jefe suggests you try being alone for a while.  You’re not being fair to yourself and especially the new guy.  Having feelings for an ex and considering getting back with them while in a new relationship is just wrong.  Let’s just say that you do get back with Ike.  Will it be because he was your project, obligation or because of love?  You need to figure out a lot of things, chica.  Jefe wishes you well.  Don’t settle for anything but the best.

Submit your questions to: ask_jefe@yahoo.com

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